LUCY, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

Oh yes! Caesars have offered their daughters, but I was never like those busters. Pharaohs have invited me to dine so that a princess would be mine. They would march in nine to twist and whine, but I’ve suspected, marrying an Egyptian isn’t at all my line. So I went to my mother’s town, but…

WHAT WE’RE LOOKING FOR

For millions, it’s money. For thousands, it’s entertainment. For hundreds, it’s spirituality or science or art. For scores, it’s identity. What our souls yearn for; what fulfilment portends to us, differ, based on geographical, genetic, racial and psychological differences. Many find what they seek; many, never will they find, but death which shall seal their…

MARRIAGE COUNSELLING

Some men just can’t stand intelligence in women. When a woman is brilliant and always defends her opinions, they consider her proud and unsuitable for marriage, especially if she’s formally schooled. They think if she goes further in her education and badges her Masters or PhD, she’ll be proud, arrogant and disrespectful. What they rather…

DEAR LUCY,

You came when I gave up on love like an angel from above. When you said you’ll be my wife, laughter filled my life, but who knew that life wields a knife, instead of marriage, now we have a strife. You shouldn’t have called me baby when you knew you wouldn’t be my lady. Our…

THE OGOID WAR (First Cry)

I was lonely for so long, surviving on memories of beautiful days past. I could choose to hate, or like so many, lie, but I looked not with my flesh but with my heart; I loved sincerely and that was my sin, all my reasons to smile turned reasons to brood. It wasn’t her fault,…

My Resolution

Unto my past, bravery had put me up to look. Good ol’days when while I snored mum would cook, and after eating I would grab nothing but a book. Oh when with a female I shared no hook! But all the glee, soon enough, time would crook, sadly, pressed into the nook. When Kemisola dragged…

Francis Is Alive (-17-)

The band was disbanded, save the drum setter. The club went quiet and tensile as Francis grabbed the microphone. “My name is Michael Livingstone and this is my friend, Anatoly, the celebrant, we’re here to sing y’all a song.” Only the bloggers clapped; curious souls who probably wouldn’t be alive to blog what was to…

​FROM PORT HARCOURT WITH LOVE

Dear Lord eBay, unlike you, I find my expressions rather difficult to put into words but as you’ve told me once, a beginner should let her heart do the writing and stand out of its way. That is what I intend to do now. I pray the effort prevails! eBay, do you practise voodoo? Seriously,…

Untitled Eulogy

Love, only in stories had been a thing of solidness to me, and disgusting it was to me the sight of men crying for ladies in the panorama of electric boxes until like them, I met my doom clothed in femininity, elegance and beauty when I least expected and I never remained the same. When…

GITTY LIKE (Part 7 of 7)

Charles shove the magazine aside and called on John. He came wiping sleepiness off his face. “The girl is not picking my calls, what shall we do?” Charles asked. “Ah,” John took a seat and gazed at the ceiling for a moment, then at Charles. “Boss, I don’t think this girl is interested o,” he…

GITTY LIKE (Part 6 of 7)

There are two phases in unmarried women’s lives, the first phase is when they’re run after by boys, making the girls feel like celebrities; choosy and proud. The second phase is when, having grown older, ripe for marriage but still single, they foray out in search of boys in whose hands they could craftily place…

GITTY LIKE (Part 5 of 7)

Mathew guffawed over his phone screen. He lurched out of his bed excitedly and dashed to the living room where his friends were. “Guys, I no fit laugh alone o,” he chuckled. “Come see wetin the yeye girl don post for Facebook.” They circled around the phone and one of them read it aloud. “Men…